August 2015-February 2017 Return With Honor

Monday, August 31, 2015

Week 2 in NJ

Holy goodness this week has FLOWN by!!!! I can't even believe that it has been an entire 7 days since I have gotten to talk to any of youuuu!!!! I am actually going to attempt to send pictures today! ...hopefully technology is actually real so it will work! (Love you Momo)
So.... Not gonna lie... this week has been a little rough... I mean I was expecting tough times, but I guess I thought that since I had been preparing so hard for so long before my mission that I would be an exception to the rule? That maybe it wouldn't be as hard for me to get going? That possibly all the talk about struggles was just a problem that silly people with small brains have? Buuuttt either I am just a silly person with a small brain or I am not actually as awesome as I thought I was...
You know how on the movie "Cars" Doc Hudson tells Lightening McQueen "Turn right to go left?" Well that is what I have been struggling with. It seems that to really get anywhere with living the gospel, you have to forget about what you are trying to do. Like if you want to be more converted, you have to focus on others instead of working on yourself. If you want to be more happy, you can't be stressing about doing things that make you happy all the time. If you want to be wiser, you have to first admit that you don't know anything and be humble so that you can learn. If you want to get blessings, you can't do things for yourself. If you want to be a great missionary and return home with honor, you have to forget yourself and go to work. It seems so contradictory! Why can't I just go left without making myself dizzy by turning right?! But I think I am finally beginning to understand that Heavenly Father doesn't fix our weaknesses so that we can go to work, He fixes them as we work. We have to allow our faith to go through trials before we can expect it to get much stronger.
All of this really started to hit me when Sis Roundy and I had a pretty disappointing appointment with a couple of new investigators we had. We had met John and Barbara door knocking one night before we went home, and they told us right off the bat that they were Evangelical Christians or something like that, but that even though they didn't believe that the Book of Mormon was scripture from God, they wanted to read it to know what it said. So we gave them a copy and talked for a while, and then exchanged numbers to meet again sometime. Well a few days later they called and invited us to meet them at a diner so we could talk more about our beliefs. We were super excited right!!! We tried to get a few members to come out with us, but after no success, our bishop finally said that he would meet us there. So we meet get over the small talk, and everyone kind of went around and bore their testimonies. But then some scriptures and doctrine started to get thrown around between Bishop and them and then it was pretty much lame sauce. At the end they said that they respect the way that we believe, but they can't accept it. It was so hard. Sis Roundy and I were both so upset. I wanted to like blame Bishop or something for not doing more to keep the spirit and bear testimony... but I knew that it wasn't his fault because John and Barbara just weren't willing to entertain the thought that what we were saying was true or pray about it.
So that night was really hard for me. And the next day was hard. And the next day was hard. It wasn't until yesterday that Sis Roundy finally cornered me and got me to talk about everything. Such a weight was lifted off of me, and I knew that God is real! Christ lives! Everything that I had been taught all my life was true. It was a hard and frustrating lesson to learn, but my testimony sure is stronger now, and I am that much closer to being like my Savior. He wants me to be happy. He wants me to be myself! He wants me to be genuine! That is such a comforting thought isn't it? That the thing He wants from us is the thing we are best at doing! The hard part is when he takes you and starts chipping off all the bad parts haha!
Oh yeah! Did I tell you that our ward split the Sunday before we got here, so everything was all new to everyone (which was kind of nice since we were both new to the area), and the bishop of the new ward that we are serving in is Bart Oates. He was a famous player for the New York Giants. He is a HUMONGOUS MAN! His hands are like the size of dinner plates... He is super nice, but kind of reminds me of a gorilla. Everyone around here knows him apparently. And his house is HUGE!!! Its even bigger than he is!
Anyways. Can you just understand how many people are here in New Jersey!?!! SO MANY PEOPLE ARE HERE IN NEW JERSEY!!! And guess what? None of them belong to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints!!! The ward boundaries are HUGE and the ward is so small!!! It makes me so sad! But it really is just a motivation to work harder and make sure we talk to EVERYONE!!! The more people we talk to the more opportunities to share the gospel and help them come closer to Christ!
But ohmigoodness everyone here seems to TALK SOOO MUCH!!!! We don't want to be rude, but we have been having problems with being late to other appointments because some silly people can't take a hint and write it in their journal... Sorry that was mean. I love everyone here. Yup.
Ok wellllll....... Miracles happen. God is good. Aaaand the Book is blue. The Church is true. Amen.
Love you all boatloads!!!!!!!!
-Sister Baine! 😁